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Saturday 30 May 2020

I openly admit...

 I am prejudiced!
My bete noire is pigeons.
They are okay if they just leave me alone.  Go pester the people in Trafalgar Square.  Oh yes, I forgot there aren’t any folk in Trafalgar Square or come to that any other places of interest to pigeons.  
I know, they think, let’s go to that huge tree in Ludlow, have sex and raise a family.  There is food on tap in an all weather covered venue she oddly calls a Wrenery.  It should be called a Pigeonary, but we really aren’t that bothered!  Free food to be had, although it is a faff waiting until ‘she’ goes out!


The tree is bloody enormous, it sheds lots of twigs that are absolutely ideal for our Grand Designs project.  We could even write and arrange for Kevin to pop by to feature us on his programme... pity we can’t... write, that is!
Building was under way, we got a bit blasé about not bothering that ‘she’ was sitting enjoying the garden right underneath.  Personally I think it was our ruddy wings clattering that gave us away.  With eagle eye she peered up, the glint said it all! 
Strolling casually across, you would never believe what happened next?  She only went and got a huge bamboo stick and rustled it in the tree.  We flew off and regrouped, planning our next move.
Over the next couple of days, we were all on a war footing.  Her attack grew more sophisticated, not content with rustling the tree she even targeted the wife’s derrière with a stick.  Creeping up armoured she caught her unawares while she was intent on a little light weaving of twigs.  Twice that happened.  If she thinks that will deter us ‘she’ has another think coming!

That dear readers is why some of you might think I am not nice to know?  And who am I to blame you?


12 comments:

  1. Dear Pigeon......if only you could do things quietly..that would be great, thank you!

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    Replies
    1. Yup pigeon, especially when the top of the food chain is on your case. Being a cordon bleu cheffette... pigeon pie isn’t outside of her repertoire, so beware!

      LX

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    2. All that plucking and removing of guts though! and then you only get a mouthful.

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    3. Just an idle thought Thelma from an idle lass. Pays to let these pesky pests know who the boss is though!

      LX

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  2. Replies
    1. With an evil eye too! I’ve got that close!

      LX

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  3. Ah, Sky Rats, tho' I show a respect for the right of all living things to exist, like you, there are some that I'd rather not have causing an infestation on the Homefront! We have an Urban Farm now and oddly it has more Natural Wildlife than Urban Wildlife Nuisance Animals. We had more Pigeons when we were way out in the Desert, which was just Weird, why did they migrate where Predatory Indigenous Raptor Birds picked them off like a flying Buffet I often wondered? They persisted out there and everyone tried all kinds of things to get them off the Eaves of their Fancy Homes. I'm glad it's not problematic now, so I Hope you find a solution that is Humane but gives you Relief.

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    Replies
    1. A poke up the bum with a stick is definitely humane, I would say. Just gives them the distinct feeling they are not welcome, that is enough surely?

      LX

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  4. I suggest you buy yourself a water pistol on your next trip to the shops! If nothing else it will have all of Ludlow wondering why!! lol.xx

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    Replies
    1. I invested in a high velocity water pistol once before, trouble was by the time I pumped it up the cats crapping on my veg plot were three counties away!

      LX

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  5. May you frighten them all back to Trafalgar Square. And, those allium are beautiful. Mine are just done.

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    Replies
    1. They see me coming and fly... what power I have! The alliums are nearly over here too. Where they are at the mo we plan a small pond, so when all in that flower bed are finished we aim to start digging.

      LX

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