elasticated trousers I got to thinking... just how am I going to play this enforced isolation?
Am I going to let my true slovenly self out, which I ought to say is very appealing to me?
Stop wearing a bra, as no one will be able to see the resulting swing?
If I wore dentures I could keep them safely in the glass beside the bed without fear or favour.
I could eat for Britain and the rest of the world combined... well until my bunker full of store ingredients ran out. That or the waistband of my trews got elastic fatigue and died, revealing my lower half to the unseeing world.
I need never pluck a stray hair out of my chin ever again.
I wouldn’t need to wash, well apart from my hands, floss my teeth or clean them even. The food parcels I make and send I could still make and scoff the contents myself. I could tell folk I am booking a world cruise knowing full well it wouldn’t happen. How impressed all would be at my great wealth.
I could start to be kind and considerate, well that wouldn’t happen because there would be no one around to enjoy my bonhomie. It would be wasted on the husband as his suspicions would be on high alert.
What’s a girl to do I ask you?
Not to touch your face...
I know, I know.
Not to touch your face...
I know, I know.
Worrying times.
Look after yourself, keep yourself fit gardening so that you can hit the ground running when this crisis ends!
ReplyDeleteYes, of course! I am doing all the things to keep fit and healthy. It is just my wicked brain that is wreaking havoc with my imagination when on the face of it the world is facing a major shift. Is it any wonder the husband calls me a ‘daft tart’? Onwards and upwards I say...
ReplyDeleteLX
I thought your post was going to say "as I sat twanging my bra straps!"
ReplyDeleteCould so easily be! How are you coping with this enforced isolation Sue? Food, being a self sufficient lass - no prob. Family, not seeing them, hell I am sure! Stay well, be safe and carry on doing what it is you do so well.
DeleteLXX
I said, just last night, to hubby, I could easily turn into a bag lady during this crisis! I had on some leggings, a baggy jumper and after dinner last night the bra was whipped off while still fully dressed! I'm not wearing any makeup and even my hair is being a bit bad hair dayish! I do brush my teeth and wash - I'm not quite that bad - yet!! I said to hubby, you'll still love me though won't you? I got 'a look'! x
ReplyDeleteThat’s my trick... bit like producing a white rabbit out of a top hat... what a blessed relief it is too!
DeleteNever the best housekeeper I now have the excuse ‘What’s the point? We won’t be getting any visitors anytime soon!’ The cobwebs and dust are growing at a similar rate to this blooming awful virus. Each day I feel a little more like Miss Haversham...
LX
Your levity is refreshing. Be and stay Well and keep the Dark Humor coming...
ReplyDeleteThank you, sad to say I am one of those maddeningly cheery people that can be a total pain. I love life, warts’n’all and try to enjoy each day to the max. Worrying times though!
DeleteLX
Brilliant, I echo everything you've said, particularly the no bra bit. I have to admit that I have actually done (or not done) some of the things on your list!!!
ReplyDeleteGood to know I am not alone. Buttoned up I ain’t, mainly because of the strain they would be under!?!
DeleteLX
Boredom is so hard to fill.
ReplyDeleteStay well, nevertheless.
The thing is Joanne, the days are just slipping by. I have books I prudently stock piled for just such an occasion as this. Crafts projects planned, even a tapestry nearing completion, the garden planning. to do. I just can’t seem to bestir myself to get a wiggle on... weird or what?
DeleteLX